It’s not very often that I say I REALLY like a painting. I’m loving this painting thus far!
I have a confession to make.
When no one was looking, I went back to that pear painting and decided to darken the pear just a little. Long story short, I ruined it. The pear lost its translucency and organic flow. Now it’s just blah. It’s bothered me for two days now. I shouldn’t have touched it. The perfectionist OCD in me came out and I ruined a perfectly sweet painting…not to mention the time wasted :(
With that said, I gave myself a little smack across the face (A la Moonstruck with Cher) and forced myself to “SNAP OUT OF IT!” Loosing a painting because of myself stinks, but what could I take from it? How could I turn it into a strength instead of a loss? The answer is, I have now learned the hard way, I need to walk away. I need to let things be. TO JUST LEAVE THINGS ALONE!
Going into this dahlia painting, I am carrying the knowledge of this mistake. Currently, with each tiny petal, I am giving myself one shot. There will be no over glazing of other colors, no adding, no deleting. One shot.
Today I had shadows to tackle on both vases. I took a deep breath, filled the areas with paint, let them meld and mingle and I did not touch them again.
I think my work looks stronger already by sticking to my guns and not fussing.
I guess overworking in art is a form of self-doubt. You’re not trusting your gut to lay down your intentions the first time around.
Today, I listened to some beautiful classical music and quieted my mind. I’m on Day #276 and still trying to master listening to myself. My inner self. So much jumble, so much angst, but when I quiet myself, focus and work from my heart, the desired outcome can make its way through.
Once in a while, I catch a glimpse and it’s just enough to keep me searching.