Mans Best Friend

2018-01-22 09.48.59

Sorry peoples – I’s a cat person!

There was that week, the one where I totally freaked out about ruining all the paintings I was working on? It was a few weeks back.  Well, in response to my-freak out, I stepped away from the paintings I was working on and started some new ones.  The new ones were way smaller – like 11×14 as opposed to 20×24’s.  I encouraged myself to go small and go simple.  This way maybe I wouldn’t flee the scene never to return!

2018-01-16 15.06.59

It worked.  It kept me at it. I focused on creating colors that I particularly like (up until this point my paint selections have been random without any thought.) I love this color combo.  So that was one small success.

I don’t know, but instantly I saw a cat.  Above, you can see my editing outline.  From there, I tried really hard not to over-do and add unnecessary layers of paint which is where I get into unhappy-color-land. So, I did very little.  I added molding paste to the background to give it a rough palette knife texture, added some details and tried as hard as I could to keep it simple.  I still feel guilty like I didn’t work hard enough or struggle enough, but I let that go, and that felt pretty good.  I really have to practise relaxing and not over thinking.  This is SOOOO HARD for me!  I always feel like I am too late and coming from behind when it comes to painting. Any one into the theater production of Hamilton?  There is a song asking “Why do you write like your running out of time?” Man I can totally relate.  Hamilton wrote at a fevered pitch.  If his peers wrote 20 documents, he was writing 80. The running out of time part was that he did.  He died early.  I feel like my spirit feels like it’s working against Life’s clock.  That or I’m just completely mental.  Let’s just hope I’m mental :)

As for cats.  It’s hidden in the final painting, but I found myself writing “Thank you for teaching me how to love”.  I really mean this.  My cat has helped me with my spiritual practise.  Every day I pick her up.  I feel her warmth, her heart beat, her purr and it instantly forces me to become present.  When she prances by, I take it as a reminder to stop everything, appreciate exactly where I am and exactly what I’m doing.  It is one of the few reminders that literally walks by me each and every day.  I hug her tight, enjoy looking out the window, observing, being quiet and being peaceful.  Unfortunately, it lasts about as long as my meditation practise – not very long, but at least it’s daily :)

My cat teaches me gratitude and for that I am truly grateful.

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